Some of you may have noticed the recent media attention that Learning Domestic Discipline has drawn over the past week. We have debated back and forth on whether or not to address it, or to move forward with LDD as scheduled. We’ve decided to do both. For those expecting a Mailbag Monday article today, we’ll resume our regular scheduled Mailbag Monday posts next week.
The primary reasons we’re addressing this are due to the large number of inaccuracies reported in the media about us personally, about Learning Domestic Discipline, and about the domestic discipline lifestyle in general. We feel we should be able to tell our side of the story, and although we know this will likely not change the naysayers minds, we hope that it at least helps them to separate fact from fiction.
To be clear, Learning Domestic Discipline is not a Christian Domestic Discipline website.
If you’ve been reading Learning Domestic Discipline for the past couple of years, you likely understand that already. But, for those who are new to our website, we want to make that perfectly clear. Domestic discipline has several different “branches”, and one of those is Christian Domestic Discipline. Other “branches”, or dynamics, in the domestic discipline lifestyle include The Spencer Plan dynamic and the FLR (“female led relationship”) dynamic. Finally, the last “branch”, or dynamic, is the traditional dynamic, which is primarily what Learning Domestic Discipline covers, although our articles can easily be adapted to fit the different branches (or dynamics).
We also do not practice Christian Domestic Discipline in our own marriage. Despite what you may have read in the multiple inaccurate and irresponsible media reports, we (Clint and Chelsea) do not practice Christian Domestic Discipline, and nowhere on our blog, website, forums, social network, eBooks, etc. have we ever claimed differently. We have always practiced the traditional form of domestic discipline and although we do believe in God, and are Christians, we do not believe in or support many of the Christian Domestic Discipline principles and ideologies that are outlined on the Christian Domestic Discipline website(s). Furthermore, we do not justify our domestic discipline practices with any specific religion.
The confusion comes from the following:
A few weeks ago, we were contacted by a reporter at The Daily Beast. Her original email was very brief. She indicated she was doing a piece on Christian Domestic Discipline and asked if we would be willing to share our thoughts. Since we are familiar with Christian Domestic Discipline and its principles, we agreed. Our goal has always been to spread the word of domestic discipline to others. With Christian Domestic Discipline being a branch of the bigger domestic discipline picture, we viewed this interview as a positive thing.
As soon as the interview became very personal (as in about our own marriage, and not about the CDD lifestyle) I immediately told the reporter numerous times that although we were Christian, we do not identify our marriage as a Christian Domestic Discipline one. I further went on to tell her that we do not believe in many of the CDD principles, although we have nothing against those who do. Unfortunately, that important piece of information was conveniently left out of the article and was replaced with several misinterpreted, twisted, manipulated, edited, and completely made up statements to sensationalize her article. From there, numerous other media outlets picked up the story and it went viral. However, the fact remains that the other media outlets took their information directly from the original inaccurate Daily Beast article and therefore were inaccurate as well.
We understand that many people will not agree with the domestic discipline lifestyle, and may never agree with it. However, we feel as though we are being portrayed and targeted as a Christian Domestic Discipline couple/website and that is not what we are, or what our website represents. If you take the time to read many of the LDD articles, this will become very clear to you very quickly.
We want readers to know and understand the following things about the domestic discipline lifestyle:
- Christian Domestic Discipline is a branch of domestic discipline. Not all couples that practice domestic discipline practice Christian Domestic Discipline. In fact, a fairly small percentage of domestic discipline couples do. There are websites dedicated to Christian Domestic Discipline which you can find here, as well as other places around the web. Learning Domestic Discipline is not one of them.
- Everyone seems very focused on the spanking aspect of the lifestyle. Spanking is a small (and, in many marriages, rare) aspect of domestic discipline. In fact, there are couples who choose to practice the domestic discipline lifestyle without including spanking at all. Spanking does not define domestic discipline.
- Domestic discipline is a consensually agreed upon lifestyle, and that consent can be withdrawn at any time by either partner.
- The head of the household in a domestic discipline relationship is not always male. There are many other dynamics of domestic discipline where the female is the head of the household (FLRs), or the rules and consequences are equally shared between both partners (this is known as The Spencer Plan).
And finally, to the domestic discipline community (and beyond) who has sent us an overwhelming amount of support in the form of emails, comments, text messages, and more – we are thankful and grateful. Our vision for Learning Domestic Discipline has never changed, and never will. We aim to present all forms of the domestic discipline lifestyle with true, correct, and accurate information to readers all around the world. We also aim to provide those who are currently in domestic discipline relationships, or those who wish to be, with resources and information to ensure that they do not feel so lost and/or alone in the lifestyle. These visions will never change, despite the fact that Learning Domestic Discipline is growing at a very rapid rate.
We remain committed to this lifestyle, the community, and each other. We also remain committed to making sure that those interested in domestic discipline, regardless of their opinion of it, know and understand the truth about this relationship dynamic.
Thank you, and best wishes to all.
– Clint and Chelsea
Also, for those interested, Chelsea addressed and clarified the specific inaccuracies of the media articles in the comments section of her latest post, “Domestic Discipline is Abuse?” Part 2: Chelsea’s Story.
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